Goose droppings

Yesterday I bought a banana and a yogurt cup for breakfast - $3.75. Today I spent $7.00. What did I eat? 3 breakfast bars and a Yoohoo. I could get three times that much food at the Denny's for less money! Granted, it's the Denny's vs. a hotel gift shop, but regardless.

One day I would like to walk around all day with a milk and/or whipped cream mustache and just see what people do.

Uni-brows are most unfortunate. More unfortunate is when the person donning said uni-brow is painfully unaware of the fact, and thus does nothing to counteract it's devastating effects to mankind.

Fashion feauxpas - 80's track jacket. It was complete with a neon pink stripe. Fortunately she wasn't wearing the pants that match. Unfortunately her hair was a disaster. She was wearing one of those giant tooth clips. Not quite a banana clip, but close. Only it was clipped side-ways across the top of her head and contained only about half of her hair - which had been dampened by the rain. Her lip-stick, however, shone with all the effervescence of a highway patrolman's spot light, and was a shade just this side of 'whore'.

I offended someone today. Now, you may be thinking - "Greg? Offend someone? Never!" But it happened. A woman excitedly asked for one of the sharpies we use to write name-tags. They're industrial sized, not the normal size you get at Wal-mart. So I made a joke about her ulterior motives for desiring said sharpie. She laughed it off initially, but after the presentation she brought it to my attention that it was, in fact, "not ok." She claimed I had defamed her character and that I didn't know her, and was therefore not in a position to joke in such a manner. I sincerely apologized and explained that it was not my intent to offend. I guess I'll have to be more careful in the future.

Tonight's festivities were crowned by a lush piece of moist, decadent, rich chocolate cake. It hurts so good.

Youtube has become my new friend - clearly I have too much time on my hands.

One of the saddest, most pathetic sights your eyes will ever behold is a wet squirrel. We had a rainstorm today. Just outside the window in front of the ballroom there was a squirrel clutching the wall for protection. He was completely drenched and nothing short of absolutely pitiful.

On my afternoon walk I was sauntering along a riverbank. There was a park located just across the street from our hotel. I noticed a small dock sticking out into the water, so I ventured out. It was quite picturesque standing at the end viewing the mixture of nature's creations and man's while softly bobbing up and down with the ebb and flow of the river's current. It all gave me an intense desire to throw myself in the river...and go for a swim. But, I only brought one pair of dress pants, so it was not to be.